# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
