You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
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