How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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