I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Randomize
