whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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