Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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