They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Randomize
