i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
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