don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
