I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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