I showed him my bush... on skype.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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