You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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