I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Randomize
