you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
Randomize
