Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Just sold all of my pants in order to buy tonight's whiskey. Goodbye, high functioning alcoholism. Hello, Dad.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
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