allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
