Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
