If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize