She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
