perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
