i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Just invented taco cereal.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
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