still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Randomize
