evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
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