we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
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