That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
