I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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