am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
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