I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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