just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just shotgunned beers for America
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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