I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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