I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
