Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Randomize
