Got a toothbrush?
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Randomize
