Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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