Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
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