I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
She just used a chaser for red wine.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
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