Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
