ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Randomize
