oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
