Farmville is her only friend.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
