are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
