If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
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