Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
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