you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
