Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
I haven't been this sober since birth.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
He? As in you personified your dick?
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
All the doctor said was why
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize