He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
