I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
I've blown a few things in my day
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
