There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Randomize
