I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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