So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
