i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Randomize
