I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Randomize
