I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Randomize
